You won’t find it in BS like “Daddy’s Little Milch Cow” or The Fifty Shades books.
But you’ll find it in Perilous Play, Suz deMello’s memoir.
Want to read the real Fifty Shades? $5.99 on Kindle.
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Disclaimer: The price of Perilous Play: The Real Fifty Shades was accurate when this post was published on September 24th, 2019. However, Amazon can and does change Kindle book prices frequently and without notice. Always look closely at the price of an ebook on Amazon before clicking that yellow button. If you purchased a Kindle book by accident, it's simple to return, just follow the return instructions here.